I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
I feel bad cuz I was his ride home, but I didn't know I was going to have a religious experience with a guy in a cookie monster t-shirt. You can't plan for that shit.
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
Tom just texted me he's Tindering from his hospital bed while they're running heart tests on him.
That's dedication to the game.
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
I know you think you’re ready to graduate but just keep these things in mind: taxes, I get up at 5 AM every morning, I have to buy vegetables when I go grocery shopping, and I can’t wear sweat pants to work. Take that victory lap and enjoy the sweat pants and bar hopping because it goes downhill real quick.
Randomize
