True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
We're trying to decide between cracker barrel an the ER
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
The moral of the story is do not hire me because everything will end up smelling like pickles and I will not sufficiently clean it up.
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
Yeah so then I used the selfie stick his mom gave me to take nudes
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
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