Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
Just got an Edible Arrangement my parents sent me for my birthday. Time to marinate some fruit in vodka.
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
Don't try to dry clothes in the microwave. They'll catch on fire.
I found my underwear on the sidewalk 8 blocks from her house while on my walk of shame. I also found our beer bag and a full beer in the bush.
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
Look, the coffee machine died a noble death. It was the way it would have wanted to go. It was a mercy exploding, really.
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
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