My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
Fyi: he's overweight and balding. My biological clock is ticking so loud I can't hear the TV.
she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
You admitted to me in secrecy that you want to jerk off a unicorn.
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
We stayed in and smoked weed and watched Dreamgirls. We made each other's vaginal lips sing the songs. Mine was Beyonce, hers was Jamie Foxx. I think this is one of those times you're jealous you're not an awesome lesbian.
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
Rule of thumb; if you ask me if my tits are fake you will not get to touch them.
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
Fucking hate kids. In particular I hate our kids.
Randomize
