Its about making memories worth repressing
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
my fraternity brothers just had an intervention for me. i either have a problem or am just on some next-level shit, im gonna go with door number 2
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
she chugged a bowl of salsa and then gave my ferret weight loss tips. she's like my fucking spirit animal now
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
Woke up the next morning in an 8 year old's bedroom. Saw my bra swinging from the spiderman ceiling fan and decided it would be best to dip out w/o it.
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
I found out Naomi Campbell and I have the same birthday and I feel like that explains so much
I had to puke in a ditch beside a cow pasture and like 50 cows just stood there and watched. I could feel the judgment.
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
Randomize
