he proceeded to punch 3 mailboxes in a row and when i asked him why, he said "because they were talking shit"... i need a new boyfriend. and a new life.
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
turns out it took a Belgian couchsurfer dressed as Heisenberg to rock my world.
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
How do you nicely stand up a date that you're skipping for a 3sum
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
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