I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
So I passed out with my boxers on in the hotel jacuzzi at 5am.. The manager who kicked me out was pretty cute so I left my name and number for her at the front desk. I'm giving it a 50/50 she calls.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
He tried to tell me that he could handle his liquor better than "all the bitches in this town." AS HE THREW UP. ALL. OVER.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
You stole my car to go to your boyfriends. Now your parents are fucking in the next room at top volume, and I have no way to escape..thought you should know that the amount of therapy I'll be needing for this is expensive.
You're the best friend ever.
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
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