Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
One of my residents in my hall just found my positive pregnancy test from last year I hid behind the fridge, I'm just going to tell them it was for a science project.
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
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he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
You missed me roundhouse kicking a lit glow stick out of a guy's mouth last night. You would have been proud.
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Opening beer with my teeth is getting easier the drunker I become.
It turns out my teeth are bleeding.
I think it would be reallllly cool if you took your best friend to work so she doesnt have to have an awkward cab ride with the driver she drunkenly made out with last night ...
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
Randomize