That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
Crashed the mayor's bday party, no list for some reason. Wore suits. Ludacris was there.
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
You don't know commitment until you try and waterproof a non-waterproof vibrator
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
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