just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
On Wednesday I'm putting wine in a water bottle and crashing Margaret thatchers funeral
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
Hey, it's not my fault that you had a shitty bed frame that couldn't handle the rough sex you're into.
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
Alan said you can come over and eat me out anytime you want, as long as we give him enough notice to hide in the closet before we arrive
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize
