how hairy? two words: wookie tits
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
Housekeeping called in a homicide detective. Just spent an hour explaining that we had vigorous hotel vacation sex five times, even though I was having a heavy flow day. It'll definitely be what you call a memorable honeymoon.
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
It wasn't a mystery that it was the pizza cooking in the oven when we stumbled out of the bedroom in a smoke filled apartment at 2am. We are dangerous drunks
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
Randomize
