Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
The online application for Mcdonald's said I could do incredible things there. Today I threw out shit filled underwear in the women's restroom and escorted a very drunk/high 42 year old man outside after he ordered a 5 dollar foot long and a bloody mary.
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
i woke up to the sound of my roommate climbing onto my desk mumbling that she was going to bed
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
Don't mean to be rude. But did you, by any chance, cut down a tree from my neighbors backyard last night? And did you also drag it to my yard and burn it?
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
I was the king of the handle race. My team finished it in 56 minutes.
you don't get it. Nobody wins a handle race. there just degrees of losing.
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
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