shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
my vag is so smooth its legendary
you told his mom that the only thing he wants for christmas is his dick in your mouth
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
So basically i got outta bed and started peeing on the a/c unit..when my roommate tried to stop me i looked at him and said "i got this"
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
This was the first time I've ever pushed myself until I vomited. Sorry, random couple laying on a dock at 8:30am. I would have picked a better spot so you didn't have to watch/listen to me vomit, but you guys were being MAD quiet. I had no idea you were there.
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
It's like my uterus was saying, "hey, you're not pregnant, but imagine if you were!"
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
He stumbled out of their hotel room and yelled, "I'M ON A STATEWIDE TOUR. I'VE BEEN IN KENTUCKY AND OKLAHOMA."
Randomize
