so after all day drinking, we went to an all u can eat crab place and i was going from table to table surveying the crowd if they though the crab i was carrying around looked like the flying dog from never ending story...what the hell is wrong with me?
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
Apparently she saw two women get in a slapping match over a comforter at target yesterday. She said it was awesome. Clearly I take after her.
I traded the garbage men the rest of my handle for a ride home. Best. Walk. Of. Shame. Ever.
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
Randomize
