She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
So I got lost trying to find you guys and ended up proposing to a bride in a bachelorette party with a condom.
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
Just text him and be like do you want this pussy or not. You have three seconds to respond.
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
Dude, I'm at a wedding and there's a mashed potato bar and bacon strip appetizers. I'm getting all emotional.
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
Randomize
