If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
He said he's gonna start calling me "Benny" because we're "friends with bennyfits"
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
Now that I'm single, I like to think of myself as in a relationship with Taco Bell.
I'm naked, I'm drunk, and I'm all up on social media right now
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
The last time we went to a costume party, you walked around in a loincloth with a cross and said you were Jesus. I'm eager to see how much more offensive you can be.
Randomize