He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
He's in a nude suit, bald, with a pink headband and a black sharpie streak down his forehead.
i seriously haven't spoken to him since i drunk dialed him and told him i loved his beard
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
Well in other news, my nipples are healing pretty well but next time I get drunk and decide to pierce something please for the love of god stop me!
You asked to borrow my glasses for a moment. Then you whipped them at someone's head.
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
Btw I puked in your glovebox
Randomize
