a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
I just had to explain to the pharmacy cashier that the Plan B and thank you notes I was buying were not related.
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
He blended the pizza with water and drank the whole thing. He is my hangover hero
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
returning from a 6am booty call in 2 feet of snow on a Tuesday is a bold new kind of low for me
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
Randomize