The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
You called me at 2am singing 'happy birthday' while screaming 'I fucking love you' verses, all while eating a burrito and taking a piss off your apartment balcony
Yeah I know, the people below me already told me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
Siri just called me GayBoy in front of my family. I will destroy you.
So on a scale of 1 to Friendship-Over, how mad would you be if a rando I brought home sharted on the shag carpet in the living room?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
I just puked in a chili’s bathroom... happy birthday to me
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