Ducking stuck downtown...all the fuxkig roads are blixkded
is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
A small child is toddling around the store, holding a coloring book and a shot glass. Thinking of you.
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
My kid just put flowers in my hair to make me pretty, then showed my boobs to an entire playground. He's either the best wingman or the worst.
Good friends go out of their way to crop dust your ex not once but twice. I knew we were friends for a reason
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
Randomize
