Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
Things I love twice as much when drunk: Taco Bell. Office chairs that roll. Classes.
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
I didn't just randomly come up with it. But if you want to give me extra credit for creativity I have a bare chest and chocolate sauce left
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize
