My Hamptons summer hookup resume reads like a walk-in clinic waiting list.
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
I accidentally stubbed my dick
What does that even mean?
Randomize
