Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.
i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents
you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
Had a dream that you were held at gun point. But I killed the guy. Then we embraced in the biggest hug while everyone around us clapped... Kinda how I imagine our wedding...
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
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