dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
the breathalyzer kept saying danger. we made our new slogan danger we need more shots
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
B. I found a note on my phone and all it says is 'Fuck yeah im a racecar'
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
You are, as of last night, the self declared king of pooping. Long may you reign.
Randomize
