Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
party gras won. party gras always wins.
And by "hammer out the details" you know I mean spending 20 minutes on wedding plans then getting wine drunk, right?
So the keyword here is "hammered"?
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
When I'm famous, she'll look at her kids and go "I saw her buttcheeks beefore she was famous. I'm truly blessed."
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
You just sent me an audio message of you peeing. That’s true love right there.
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
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