what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
My third nipple is alarmingly under-appreciated.
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
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