He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
Whoever decided to wrap my shins in duck tape owes me new leg hair.
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
An old man just slapped my ass and handed me five dollars while I was filling chips at subway. I feel violated, but that was the easiest five dollars I've ever made.
Why didn't you ever bring me to the pope as a baby so he could kiss me.
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
Isn't it funny how we're still best friends after that incident with the old lady in the bathroom
You fucking bailed on me. But I love you still
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