My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
Tempting. But I already used the alcohol poisoning excuse at work this month. No way he would believe it a second time...
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
He just texted me asking for his shirt back and I said I didn't have it and then I ran into him 5 minutes later while wearing the said shirt
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
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