Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
my breakfast just consisted of gushers (made with real fruit!) and they're trying to tell me im not eating right?
Of course, I believed he would find me irrestible...sloppy drunk, chugging from a bottle of chardonnay, and completely naked because those kids stole my clothes as I was swimming on their private beach
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
we put a pacifier in your mouth because you kept drunkenly singing country music.
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
you were holding her above your head singing Circle of Life in what i assume was a Simba reference. then she smacked her head on a bar light and the bouncers kicked you out
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
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