Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
But on the up side she uprooted a whole peony plant from the hotel downtown and said, "I brought you flowers"
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
I pretended I didn't remember seeing him hookup with that freshman, and he pretended he didn't remember seeing me hookup with that old guy. We have a beautiful and unawkward friendship.
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
The best part about being single is knowing how much everyone secretly creeps behind their gf/bfs back. You wouldn't believe..Have a great date night!
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Randomize
