So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
All I wanted to do was come home from work and masturbate for national sex day... I sliced my the tip of finger giving myself a pedicure so I can’t even do that #singlelife
Oh man. I threw up in the first cab. Got kicked out. Roamed somewhere for awhile. Fell asleep in the back if the second cab. Woke up in my underwear on the living room floor with a frozen pizza (thawed) laying next to me
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
Randomize
