I just found out that AAA will pick you up if you're drunk for free if you're a member. How did I not know about this?
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.
I thought my dog was a polar bear. I kept asking how the north pole was this time of year.
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
So there we are, fucking beneath the Christmas tree and I glance up and see one of the local Jehovah's witnesses staring in horror through the decorative glass in the front door. I'm so proud of us.
Randomize
