We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
He snuck into some random hotel's continental breakfast at 3 AM and then passed out on a bench in the lobby. When the cops found him they made him empty out his pockets. No phone, no ID just muffins.
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
I was greeting people at my door feeding them jello shots out of an ice cube tray with a spoon.
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
Honey you are a beautiful woman but I came over to eat your pizza and fuck your brother. And you're out of pizza.
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
Randomize
