Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
in retrospect, i probably shouldn't have referred to his dick as "travel size"
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
Where are you on a scale from one to wasted?
Like alphabetically I'd say a v
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
Randomize
