I'm eating my dinosaur chicken nuggets in the order they would die in the food chain.
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
Year anniversary in a month. Think I'll just give him a COME ON MY FACE FREE card. I'm both broke and shameless.
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
Randomize
