the bitch is dead man
YOUR DOG DIED?
no i meant my mom has passed out .. so i'll be over soon.
dude, osama threatened the US again
dude. i slept with your sister last night
what?
I saw that as an opertune moment to drop some big news
I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
He had a number 3 tattooed on his penis. And when I asked what it meant, he said " you know like dale earnhardt, the intimidator".
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
If anyone could figure out how to pee on someone's soul, it would be you.
You always know what to say to make me feel better.
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
I'm trying to find a fanny pack so I can bring pizza on my run
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
Randomize
