Aren't you glad we're at the point in our relationship where I don't even ask why you're hiding in the cabinet?
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
her best friend is in town and she told me that they used to fool around when they were drunk and I'd have to "help keep that from happening"
you motherfucker
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
Dude, you got arrested and then texted 911 to tell them you'd been kidnapped with a screenshot of your current location.
Thanks to you I just drunkenly spot washed a Star Wars hoodie, at midnight on a Friday. If there is a greater level of nerdiness I do not know of its existence
it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
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