My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
When a best friend shows up on a tricycle with a case a beer and goes "get on loser" you get on, because there is a magical adventure afoot
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
Randomize
