We're facebook friends in real life
Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
At least I know she didn't hear me crawl to my room. Or did I walk on my hands? Fuck if I know.
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
Randomize
