Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
Dude, you punched me in the face bc I wasnt ordering your tbell fast enough. Then when you got it, you threw it out the window bc, and I quote, "OBAMACAREEEE!"
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
Dude. Where are you? I'm making waffles in the waffle iron. It's beautiful.
Just letting everyone know that I am still alive after last night. On a related note, this is the 15th "I'm not dead!" mass text I've sent. You've got to celebrate the little things.
Also a shrinking boner emoji would be helpful
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
Randomize
