I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
Very hungover, bought a newspaper and found my shorts from last night in the machine.
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Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
Using the balance in my bank account I just calculated how many fifths of vodka I can buy this year. Don't let me buy food, all my money is reserved for alcohol
I was gonna drive but when i tried to use telekinesis to get my keys, I knew I shouldn't be driving
Waking up early to fuck the hot DILF the day before Father's Day because I'm respectable like that
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I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
I love the barter system - he got laid and I got him to bring me some ibuprofen. A win-win really.
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
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