I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
Accidentally peeing a little on the couch in the middle of a sneeze is way different from railing a random on our waffle counter. I am the better roommate.
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
He has a beach house and a Simba tattoo. Our wedding is next Tuesday, hope you're free.
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
Randomize
