youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
wake up i wanna do it froggy style
You were directing traffic around her for 30min after she passed out in the middle of the road.
You really are best friends.
I just found that video of you jumping onto my exercise ball feet-first and face-planting into my shoe rack.
If you were awake I would probably ride my bike over, fuck you like a god, leave you in the wonders of life, and bike home
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
I just got home and someone ate all my chicken nuggets. Bitches be asking for a death sentence?
Not as awesome as someone telling you that you have the biggest tits they've ever seen. And they're like 30-something, so they've seen a decent amount of tits in their lifetime.
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
I DONT WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
Randomize
