this guy showed up at my house asking for his sword and cape. something tells me i shouldn't drink that much again.
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
I'll pull you in a wagon. You'll have a sash and a crown on and we'll sing "All the Single Ladies"
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
Oh boy. Send him a care package with laxative cookies and alcohol. So he can shit himself while he's passed out drunk.
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
Randomize
