There is a strange man mowing my lawn. Best day ever.
everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
I'm sorry for getting drunk and throwing a robo-bird at you.
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
Randomize
