it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
If that was your dad, he is hot
morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
You told her you double majored in Geology and Telekinesis. When has that line ever worked for you?
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
Dude, you were so drunk you were hanging from the ceiling of my car pretending you were a sloth while we were on 81.
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
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