I'm a grown ass woman and I'm sitting in bed eating pizza at 4:30 a.m. BFD, right?
I told him to come back in 5mins cause i needed to take a few more shots before i could talk to him
when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
is wine microwaveable?
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Out of desperation, I used the leftover sauce from my goat masala as a mixer for vodka shots.
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
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