Texts From Last Night

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  (586): View more from Michigan

  matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.

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  (586): matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet. http://tfl.nu/32zr
  Replies (19) Good night (1173) Bad night (1197)
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  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today

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  (603): It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today http://tfl.nu/pqk1
  Replies (10) Good night (4272) Bad night (556)
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  (501): View more from Arkansas

  My mom just bought me $200 worth of booze on the condition that I promise I won't have to go to rehab eventually

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  (501): My mom just bought me $200 worth of booze on the condition that I promise I won't have to go to rehab eventually http://tfl.nu/zmvh
  Replies (19) Good night (8002) Bad night (704)
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  (551): View more from New Jersey

  Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.

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  (551): Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again. http://tfl.nu/vdhg
  Replies (51) Good night (898) Bad night (4451)
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  (337): View more from Louisiana

  Some creeps at the festival started talking to me, so I told them I was going change my tampon. Worked like a charm.

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  (337): Some creeps at the festival started talking to me, so I told them I was going change my tampon. Worked like a charm. http://tfl.nu/whuj
  Replies (39) Good night (7421) Bad night (1113)
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  (303): View more from Colorado

  He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed

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  (303): He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed http://tfl.nu/muwj
  Replies (21) Good night (5077) Bad night (908)
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  (403): View more from Alberta, CA

  were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.

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  (403): were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found. http://tfl.nu/pucp
  Replies (13) Good night (2289) Bad night (954)
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  (702): View more from Nevada

  Its 6:30 and I'm shotguning a busch ice while taking a shit. Outlook for work today: interesting

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  (702): Its 6:30 and I'm shotguning a busch ice while taking a shit. Outlook for work today: interesting http://tfl.nu/9kwe
  Replies (7) Good night (1943) Bad night (959)
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  (360): View more from Washington

  You called him your tasty little crouton. Which actually wasn't the weirdest part.

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  (360): You called him your tasty little crouton. Which actually wasn't the weirdest part. http://tfl.nu/6s9f
  Replies (7) Good night (2395) Bad night (680)
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  (317): View more from Indiana

  I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.

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  (317): I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one. http://tfl.nu/jdn1
  Replies (6) Good night (1456) Bad night (684)
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  (580): View more from Oklahoma

  And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.

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  (580): And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out. http://tfl.nu/h6lx
  Replies (2) Good night (1486) Bad night (578)
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  (325): View more from Texas

  I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.

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  (325): I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol. http://tfl.nu/32t0
  Replies (1) Good night (1220) Bad night (446)
• Favorite

  (262): View more from Wisconsin

  PLEASE DON'T BE HEARTLESS COME AND GET ME FROM THE BAR I'M HIGH AS SHIT AND I LOST MY SHOES

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  (262): PLEASE DON'T BE HEARTLESS COME AND GET ME FROM THE BAR I'M HIGH AS SHIT AND I LOST MY SHOES http://tfl.nu/1xjy
  Replies (6) Good night (1078) Bad night (378)
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  (616): View more from Michigan

  you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.

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  (616): you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience. http://tfl.nu/y98f
  Replies (1) Good night (782) Bad night (215)
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  (305): View more from Florida

  I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.

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  (305): I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon. http://tfl.nu/f8kn
  Replies (1) Good night (885) Bad night (314)

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