You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
do you know how hard it is to pee with a pumpkin in the toilet ?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
For my birthday I want you to get me in bed with Donald Trump. That is all. You have 3 months
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
You called me your momma bear, and then demanded more vodka
You thought you were Snapchating on your tablet, but were really just poking John Stamos' face on my Full House dvd case...
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
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