Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
Randomize
