Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
The words "my birth control fell out" should never be spoken
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
Woke up with your brother in my bed...where do you want me to return him?
Dude I'm riding a fucking tortoise this is awesome you should come with me more often
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
Xanax, wine, and giving the neighbor blue balls. How about you?
Jesus, it’s Tuesday morning! Not back stage with Motley Crew
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