But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
Friend I haven't seen in almost a year just IMed me to let me know that my mom stuck her boob out the window on the freeway at her.
Her mom responded by mooning my mother. I really don't know what's worse.
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
My fuck buddy took time out of his date with his girlfriend to text me happy Valentines Day.
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
did i just pee glitter
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
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